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Dear Mamas & Magic Makers
What if I told you the “Black single mother problem” might not actually be about Black mothers?
What if everything you thought you knew about Black single motherhood came with a side of patriarchy, poverty, politics, and somebody else’s agenda?
And what if the “nuclear family” isn’t the only family structure worth defending?
Those are the questions we explore with our guest writer, cultural critic, and author Jamilah Lemieux whose book Black Single Mother: Tales of Longing and Belonging the book she spent years bringing into the world takes a sledgehammer to the stereotypes surrounding Black moms. The book is an exploration of Black motherhood, identity, and the stories we inherit about what a “good” family is supposed to look like.
And underneath all of it is a bigger question: What becomes possible when Black mothers no longer have to prove that their families are worthy of respect?
Jamilah was our very first guest on the podcast, so this is a full-circle moment for us. And in her return to the podcast, she discusses why she initially rejected the idea of writing about Black single motherhood, what she discovered during her writing process, and what she learned from 21 Black single mothers whose co-parenting experiences ranged from truly equitable arrangements to fathers who were essentially absent.
In this episode, we dive into:
✨ The history behind the stereotypes and how ideas about Black families have been repeated, reshaped, and weaponized across generations.
✨ The difference between sharing custody and sharing the labor of raising a child
✨ Unlearning “baby mama” shame & the cost of making mamas the villain when children struggle
✨ Media, the meaning of family, and what if Black single mothers stopped treating their families as something they have to explain
But this conversation isn’t just about dismantling old narratives. It’s about imagining something better.
Jamilah talks about Black family structures, matrilineal traditions, Black love, healing between Black men and Black women, and what could happen if Black women’s struggles were understood as Black people’s struggles rather than problems women are expected to solve alone.
Stick around till the end for our signature ‘Black Mama Say’ segment, where we put our own twist on phrases from Black Mamas. This episode, the phrase we’re twisting is “At the end of the day.”
SYLLABUS
To expand knowledge and combat misinformation and disinformation, we compile a list of references/sources for our listeners to dive into. This list includes any books, videos, podcasts, etc. that we’ve mentioned in the episode or that will help you gain a well-informed perspective. ENJOY!
Responsive Reading/Church Announcements/Praise Reports/Prayer List Requests:
- Responsive Reading
- Black Mama Magic Card Deck: Card #52 “Time is always divine.”
- Black Mama Magic Card Deck: Card #52 “Time is always divine.”
- Announcements
- Thursday, September 3rd: YOUTUBE LIVE “We Are The Ones: The Good News in Black Maternal Health
- September 14th – September 20th: National Birth Center Week: Birthing Love. Birthing Power
- June 24th – June 30th – Black Mama Creative Week: The Weight & Wonder of Black Motherhood
Mac & Cheese:
Connect with Jamilah Lemieux: Book | Instagram | Threads | Website
A renowned cultural critic and writer focused on issues of race, gender, and motherhood, Jamilah Lemieux is a leading millennial feminist thinker, social influencer, and game-changing media maverick.
Lemieux’s written work has been featured EVERYWHERE via a host of print and digital platforms, including the LA Times, Essence, Playboy, the Cut, the Guardian, Colorlines, Wired, Self, Refinery 29, the Columbia Journalism Review, the Nation, and Vanity Fair. She penned the foreword for the 2015 anniversary of Michele Wallace’s Black Macho and the Myth of the Superwoman and the 2017 re-release of Ann Petry’s Miss Muriel and Other Stories. She was also featured in the 2019 anthology How We Fight White Supremacy.
Her first book, Black Single Mother: Real-Life Tales of Longing and Belonging (Roc Lit 101/Penguin Random House) will be released on March 10, 2026.
Currently, she pens a weekly advice column for Slate‘s ‘Care and Feeding’ parenting section. She serves as the Editor-in-Chief for Still Here, a special single-issue magazine about Black women and HIV/AIDS, which will be released in 2026.
She has appeared as a commentator on various news programs for CNN, ABC, CBS, BET, Buzzfeed, MTV2, and MSNBC, as well as Comedy Central’s ‘The Nightly Show with Larry Wilmore’ and ‘The Daily Show with Trevor Noah,’ Vice’s ‘Desus and Mero,’ TMZ and The Breakfast Club, the popular nationally syndicated morning radio show. After years of calling for accountability for the famed R&B singer known for his mistreatment of underage girls and women, she was prominently featured in Lifetime’s critically acclaimed docuseries, Surviving R. Kelly (2019) and Surviving R. Kelly 2: The Reckoning (2020.) She also appeared in A&E’s Secrets of Playboy (2022.) She served as both a producer and commentator for Time of Essence (2023), a 5-part docuseries about the history of Essence magazine.
Lemieux served as the Vice President of News and Men’s Programming foriOne Digital, where she helped spearhead the creation of CASSIUS, a progressive digital lifestyle platform. Prior to that, she worked as the Senior Editor for EBONY magazine, where she played a key role in launching the publication’s website in 2012 and modernizing the brand voice and identity.
As a public speaker, Lemieux has addressed countless audiences at schools, conferences, and cultural events, including the official commemoration of the 50th anniversary of the death of Malcolm X. Her previous public speaking appearances include panels, keynotes, and hosting duties at Columbia University, Howard University, SXSW, NYU, the Brooklyn Museum, Morehouse College, Emory, and Harvard University.
Lemieux has been featured on The Root 100 list of the nation’s most influential African Americans, and has been honored by Planned Parenthood, the New York City Council, the New York State Senate, Black Women’s Blueprint, Walker’s Legacy, and the Delta Rho Omega Chapter of Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Incorporated.
Her work has included communications, public relations, and crisis management services for organizations and high-profile individuals. In this capacity, she served as the Communications and Engagement Strategist for Cynthia Nixon’s campaign for governor of New York and as a Communications Strategist for Girls for Gender Equity, a leading grassroots organizing, advocacy, policy, and service delivery organization dedicated to centering youth of color within the racial and gender justice movement of the 21st century. She resides in Los Angeles.
- Book Description: With her signature candid, humorous, and sometimes biting takes, Jamilah Lemieux suffers no fools while also courageously revealing the scars of her own parenting journey and search for self-acceptance in a world that hates “baby mamas.” With a particular verve and relatability—honed in her many years among Black Twitter’s most prominent voices—Lemieux centers the complex reality of Black single motherhood: uncertainty and fierceness alike. Black. Single. Mother. combines riveting personal essays, infused with whip-smart cultural and historical analysis, with twenty-one intimate first-person testimonies from a spectrum of Black single mothers. A long-overdue offering in celebration of the American matriarch most often maligned, Black. Single. Mother. sets out to inspire a new cultural and community dialogue about this powerful figure as one profoundly deserving of love, support, and respect.
Important definitions and links to books, organizations, videos, articles, etc mentioned in this episode.
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